Everybody does it, but few really want to do it. Yes, we’re talking about your old nemesis, death.

Still, if you gotta go, there are worse ways to go than others. Most folks would prefer to die peacefully in their sleep at the ripe old age of 150, with plenty of life insurance to make sure their family is provided for.

Here are some of the worst ways to die, randomly compiled from the most scientific and reliable source around (the Internet):

• Having your brain sucked out through your nose. (Bleech. Yep, that would suck).
• Falling into a hole so huge it takes days to finally reach the bottom, and it’s a molten lava pit, so you slowly melt. (Why do I have images of the climax scene of Raiders of the Lost Ark here?)
• Being slow roasted alive for a feast for cannibals and the only thing you have to entertain yourself is counting their teeth, and that ends quickly. (The worst part of this one is boredom. Nothing worse than a boring death, I guess.)
• Drowning in a huge tub of orange Jello. (Would red Jello not be as bad?)
• Being eaten by army ants. (Or any kind of insect.)
• Fire. As in, not smoke inhalation, but by being burned alive. (Smoke inhalation, I must admit, is supposed to be quicker and less painful.)

In that spirit, here are some of the best ways to die, according to random netizens:

• Doing something that will guarantee you are immortalized on YouTube for the ages. (Hmm. Somehow, I don’t think the Numa Numa guy would have been more popular if he’d died during a “maya-heeee.”)
• A heroic act/standing up for what you believe in. (Altruism aside, I agree. There are definitely worse ways to die.)
• Old age. (Which seems to be a higher number the older you get. Like I said, I’m hoping for 150.)
• Falling out of an airplane at a high altitude. (Because you’re going to lose consciousness before you actually hit anything.)
• With my family. (Hopefully not all at once. Maybe “in the presence of my family” would be better.)
• While having sex. (Not surprisingly, this one comes up again and again.)

Photo via jurvetson