When Animals Attack isn’t something that the television crews have to stage. It’s not like other reality shows, or even those stupid home video shows, where the action is planned. Animals are, by and large, mean SOBs. If you feel the need to spend all of your time in the presence of animals, make sure you have your term life insurance policy paid up. Sooner or later, you’re going to need it.

Here are a few of the most famous animal murders in history:

• Cleopatra. This is probably the most famous. Depending on which sources you believe, Cleopatra may have induced that Asp to bit her. However, some of the stories suggest that there were two asps, and that she didn’t necessarily antagonize the asp or asps to bit her. No one may really know for sure.
• Aeschylus. The famous Greek author was the founder of tragedy, and only one of three early Tragedians whose works survive. The legend says that an eagle came by, and mistook his bald head for a stone. The eagle dropped a tortoise on his head, killing him. So, the murdering animal in this case was either the tortoise or the eagle, depending on your perspective.
• Alexander I of Greece. No, this wasn’t Alexander the Great. This is just some King that Greece had in the 1920s. He was 27 years old when he died. He was defending his dog from a monkey attack during a walk through the Greek Royal Gardens. He died of sepsis within days of the attack after having been bit.
• Marty Feldman. This Engilsh writer and comedian was famous, in part, for his bulging eyes that were a result of Graves Disease. Feldman suffered a heart attack after coming down with food poisoning from some bad shellfish in Mexico City.
• Joselito Gomez. This famous bullfighter was the son of a matador, and he was the youngest bullfighter to become a matador at the time. He died from being gored by a bull at the age of 25. He’s considered by many to be one of the greatest bullfighters of all time.

Photo via freeparking